Tuesday, August 30, 2011

My attempt at Bohemian

A while ago, I decided to forsake civilization and live off the land out in the wilderness. So, I sold all my belongings and went into the woods to live the bohemian life, like Thoreau. I built a lean-to shelter, covered myself with bark at night to keep warm, fished out of a nearby stream for food and dug a latrine outside my camp. I also befriended the local wildlife including a little squirrel I named Snickers (because he stole my last snickers bar) and a magpie I named Maggie. Yes, this was going to be a great new life! After a while (about 5 hours), I realized that my new home was only about 20 feet from a footpath in a suburban salt lake city neighborhood, and only about 200 yards from a city park. It turns out that Maggie had actually been run over by a cement truck a few days earlier and tossed into the bushes by a pedestrian. Now I started to understand why she was so friendly and didn't fly away when I would pet her. I thought my heart was going to break. After these heart rending realizations, I decided to give up and drive back home in time to grab an In-N-Out Burger and catch the season finale of “24”. That’s the closest I’ve ever gotten to forsaking civilization and living in the wilderness like Thoreau. I have so many fond memories of my experience. I still think about Maggie sometimes and smile.

2 comments:

B. Runk said...

This is laugh out loud funny.

Unknown said...

Oh my gosh. I love you.